hey alex i fucking adore this kid but also do you know what you get walking barefoot in the south? worms. worms that crawl up the skin of your feet and go to your lungs and this has no bearing on anything but its 6am and i ust felt like i had to tell you

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actual line from his petition: "who actually thinks it's okay to walk around barefoot at camping school? You're gonna get hookworms, kid."

but also cheryl told me the acoustic guitar kid at her school used to walk around barefoot all the time so now I'm worried about him

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hi alex: if you had to ascribe three adjectives to austin's performance of wonderwall, what would they be?

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hi jj, this was harder than i thought it would be.

let's say
melodramatic (or is it heartfelt? earnest?) (it's melodramatic)
kind of awkward (he definitely forgot the words at one point and just da-da-da-da-dummed through it, it's cool, no one noticed)
AND, UM. quiet. he needs to learn to project. (if you wanted to be kind to him you could call it intimate but he hasn't earned kindness so)

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I'm so sorry, Austin.

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he deserves this, he should wear shoes more often

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do you think if i buy one of those made for like a rottweiler it would fit me

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I'm honestly thrilled you don't have to go to ij to shitpost stubby memes anymore

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apparently bash and austin went to disneyland last week and rode the ferris wheel together. as bros do.

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omg I'd seen pictures of him hanging out with Karan Brar but this is the first time Bash has made an appearance. Thanks for making him look so tall, bro.

Also now the junior class has to go to Disney for their class trip, the ebonbros have to ride the ferris wheel together.

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okay i am officially crying laughing now

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I'm fucking dying

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Me, every time Austin posts: I'm going to talk to him with Lucas!!!
Also me: But Nisha has something awful to say to him!!!!!

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All the soph girls are like Austin's little sisters spread out amongst 20 awful girls, it's good for him.

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the mediocre guitar solo is such a good burn

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I hate so much how relatable this is.

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i'm so tired and i'm crying laughing at that letter

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I was pretty proud of Joesencrantz and Billdenstern myself -3-

Also if I read Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead and it's NOT about them being vampire hunters I'm going to throw the book out the window

Edited 2017-11-22 03:14 pm (UTC)

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i see austin is exactly me

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🚨🚨 fun police is here everybody put down your smiles and back away from the jokes 🚨🚨

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can todd and austin make out for real he's having a bad week and something good needs to happen to him

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yes i support not bullying our sons long enough to give them one good thing

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god i'm such a menace to you but would Austin like to hear Todd drunkenly confess his anxieties about the future

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ah yeah man i'm getting vodkaed let's get some drunken anxieties going

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This is especially true of all the pimple plaguers today

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god i hope cheryl linked you to that comment directly bc this post has 250 replies and

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Austin's been reading every single one of them waiting for his name to come up

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Found some good games for Gaming Club.

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ebonhide night in gaming club

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hey alex not to be a hypocrite but go the fuck to sleep

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wail emoji I wish I could I have to be at work at 6:00

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This made me think of Austin. Sorry.

I'm so glad I get to bully Austin one last time.

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nisha deserves this

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THANK YOU. I'm trying to survive cards against humanity drunk with my fam but I will hit this asap.

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